i still remember you laying there in hospice, hours after life expired. the white sheet no longer moving, your limbs no longer twitching, your coloring becoming a little less life-like as the minutes ticked on. i watched our family hug each other in disbelief at what became our reality. a day we had known was eminent for six weeks.
here are a few things that i learned:
it is possible to be best friends with your sibling. tad and i work hard to be more than brother and sister. we argue, disagree, laugh, and cry but more importantly we have learned how to be supportive of each other's differences.
life is not guaranteed, live it. when a new gadget / toy / product comes out, and you want it...get it.
if there is a chance you will look back with regret, change your mind and try it. i never thought i'd own a company or be my own boss....but i wouldn't trade this opportunity for any in the world. no harm, no foul.
time heals...almost everything. i am by far the happiest i have ever been in my life. if only you had the opportunity to meet her, you'd approve....but more importantly, you'd adore her and the crazy complete way she loves me.
your last o'doul's still rattles in the door of the beer fridge every time i open it. i can't bring myself to toss it out. i still look for you every time i see joey, which isn't nearly enough. i channel your distaste for the family drama and the constant churning of such, i've moved on. i wonder which bimbo would have you cussing on the bachelor, or which dancing with the stars samba you'd approve of, if you'd still be hating on the vols, and which voice would captivate your heart on american idol. holidays, birthdays, dinners, and get togethers will never be the same...you're always missing. i think about you everyday.
12:21 a.m. 3.7.13.
